I’ve realized that while blogging is indeed a great way to give your opinions on the newest technology and news about music and all that, it’s also a good way to tell people about your life and what you go through. Maybe someone can give you advice on how to handle things based on their experience. That being said…
I’ve been dealing with depression for about 8 years now. It didn’t hit me all the sudden, it just kind of happened while in middle school. I realized that my depression had gotten bad when thoughts of suicide crossed my mind. I didn’t tell anyone at the time. I didn’t want them to think there was something wrong with me. Looking back, I wished I had went to someone sooner.
I hid my depression pretty well, I thought, until one day I was called into the high school counselor’s office. My high school guidance counselor was, and still is, an amazing person. I have nothing but respect for her. Being called into her office, I wasn’t sure what to expect. As I sat down, she told me a friend had come to her, worried about some stuff I was saying and how I was acting. We had a long talk about what was going through my head. She decided that it would be best to call my grandpa in, who was my legal guardian.
I was nervous. I didn’t want to talk about it. I wanted to keep going on how I was and act like everything was fine, even if it wasn’t.
The conversation wasn’t too long, and we both cried. After that meeting, I got set up with a counselor outside of school, and saw her for about a year, maybe more. I’ve never been one to really open up, in person, about my feelings. I’m a writer. I’d rather write you a novel in a Facebook message or a text and tell you what is wrong. That is easy for me; talking was not.
The year or so I spent seeing my counselor, it did help. I knew that I wasn’t alone, and was able to open up a little to the people around me. Flash forward to now, am I still struggling? I believe that once you have depression, it doesn’t fully go away. It stays with you, maybe quietly in the background. Someday, it will eventually stay in the background.
As for me, personally, I have my good days and my bad days. The bad days are starting to get shorter, and the good days are starting to get longer.
My best advice to anyone dealing with depression, no matter what age, is to talk to someone. You don’t have to go to a counselor. Find a good friend, or even a family member, who will listen to you and not judge you. They don’t have to understand the problems you face, and they don’t have to give the greatest advice. Listening is key. Having the feeling that someone is listening to what you’re actually saying is a great feeling.
Also remember, there is no stupid reason as to why you feel depressed. Don’t let someone tell you that you can’t feel depressed because of a certain reason. Depression comes in many forms, and for many reasons. What seems like a small problem to someone else, may seem like a big problem to you, and that is okay. Remember that.
So reach out. Lean on someone when you don’t feel strong enough. Everyone has someone who loves them. Just remember to also love yourself. Learning to love yourself is the greatest thing. It opens up a whole new world and possibilities.